Sometimes I feel that I shouldn't be with him. I woke-up one morning thinking, "Is this it? Am I really going to spend the rest of my life with this boy?" It's as if some form of despair has overshadowed every inch of my bones. Sometimes I wonder whatever happened to those butterflies that were once there 1 year ago? Technically we were dating for over 2 years, but over a year ago I fell in love. Do I have high expectations because of the way I was treated with a past ex or is it the person I am? If that were true, then I would be calling myself a high maintenance type of girlfriend and sometimes I ponder if that were the case. This guy is great, except for those little things that get to me. Sometimes I feel we're not on the same level, and no it's not about the whole sex life conundrum, it's more of the maturity level. Maybe it's because he never really, truly had a serious girlfriend. It's true, that I have gotten used to the fact that I'm with him, and breaking up is going to hurt regardless, but that's the point. Breaking-up is the thing that would be hardest thing to do. Knowing myself already, I really know how to put myself in a situation and not know how to get out of it sooner than needed. I think too much, I know, but it can't be a bad thing, unless it's to the point of being a paranoid freak or over thinking a simple scenario. The thing is, it's not such a simple situation. I'm stuck between my heart and my head, but my head is superior to my heart. I'm so confused.
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